Smallville

My parents have raved about the show "Smallville" on the WB. For those not familiar with the show, it is a reinterpretation of the Superman myth, set in modern times as we view Clark Kent as he progresses through high school.

So, as might be expected, this series hews to many of the quirks of the Superman mythos. For example, alliterative names, especially with the letter L, are common and are an indicator of future success. Clark's family is as wholesome as American-grown wheat bread. People come and go from the Kent's barn, where Clark has his homey farm equivalent of a tree fort, in everything from jeans to Armani and prom dresses and never seem to get anything on their shoes. The good characters make tough choices to do what is right for others. The evil characters make tough choices to do what is right for others, calmly explaining how it is good for others in tones that say "Yes, I know this ritual flaying hurts, but it builds character." The children from "Home Improvement" are seen and their inherent creepiness in adulthood is well-used by the casting director.

By the way, nobody ever says thank you in this show! I have gotten used to most products of the television industry, where none of the characters ever say "Goodbye" or "See you later" or any formal conclusion of a conversation.

I think you could distill out all of the common elements into something that looks like this:

[Scene: The Talon, the hip coffee shop-slash-movie theater Llana runs. Clark enters.]
Lana: Clark! Let me tell you about my emotional problems.
[Lana talks for five minutes about her self obsessed problems. Clark practices his Superman steely gaze for a few minutes, then starts lazily burning "C heart L" patterns in the wall over Lana's shoulder. Chloe arrives.]
Chloe: Hi, Lana, how are you?
Lana: Oh, I've just been telling Clark about my latest imbroglio.
Chloe: I'm sure. [Smile says "Hello", eyes say "You Die Now"]
[Chloe and Lana compete at making doe-y eyes at Clark, then leave. Lex arrives.]
Lex: Hey Clark, how's it going?
Clark: (steely gaze) I'm having some trouble with my bitches.
Lex: (sardonic) Caesar used to say to his troops, post hoc ergo propter locum. In other words, if you don't succeed the first time, rotate ninety degrees and try again.
Clark: What?
[Clark exercises steely gaze, 4 seconds. Fade to black.]
[Scene: Luthor Palace. Lex is there doing something very very rich people do, like reading a book. Clark enters.]
Clark: Lex, I think something terrible is going on.
Lex: (sardonic) Sure, Clark. But first, please take these winning lottery tickets to your parents, no strings attached.
[Clark exits without a word, steely-gazing all the way. Lionel Luthor, Lex's father enters.]
Lex: (sardonic) So, in what way have you come to cornhole me now, Dad?
Lionel: I see you're still engaging in that fascinating relationship with the Kent boy, which is I am sure highly platonic. I am quite taken with him too - highly platonic.
Lex: (sardonic) And I am sure that explains you purchasing the contract for the leper colony out from under Lexcorp, which is in no way affiliated with Lexmark.
Lionel: My boy, the more that I make you a loser the more of a success you will be.
Lex: (sardonic) I have to go now, Dad. My crack team of emotional therapists needs to get on that stat.